Tandarin

In an episode of the movie “Sex in the City,” there was a quote that went something like this: “the person who pays for a bad past relationship is the person in your next relationship.” I agree totally, and I have this theory that your dating life is a cumulative experience i.e it maintains a grade-point average, and follows the Law of Karma.

Not that I strictly believe in the Law of Karma. I just think that the concept of karma is a nice and neat ideal. If enough people believe in karma,especially in present times, then the belief could reach critical mass and become sort of true.

What I’m talking about is if you are nice and respectful in any dating relationship, whether the liaison is turning out well or bad, then the whole cultural dating scene will benefit from ones mindful behavior toward the opposite sex. Hence, being sensitive and tactful even during a breakup can prevent the cycle of bitterness and revenge that you so often see with both men and women who’ve been harshly rejected.

The Law of Karma simply means that your mean behavior could come back at you. Right back at you, in the case of Instant Karma. There’s also Delayed Karma, where your bad (or good) karma catches up with you when you least expect it. I just don’t think that karma is an actual Law of Nature. But I do think it’s a good yardstick for behavior. If you believe that your actions have equal consequences, then you will hopefully take the time to behave counter to your selfish impulses, for your own sake, if not for the sake of others’ feelings and futures too. If everyone is worried about bad karma, then we can all relax our guard a little and trust each other more.

Revenge is much easier than forgiveness when you’re hurt, and (mental, not physical) revenge is often deserved. The problem is that, in the chain of relationships in a person’s life, so often the revenge that another person deserves is instead passed on to an innocent person whom you have just met. Then, that innocent person has less trust and more bitterness in his next relationship, and the cycle of bad dating karma has begun.
 
The Unfinished Business snowballs, and men and women start to hate each other. So, as you change partners, step back and look at the big picture and all the players involved, past, present, and future, before you act or speak.

People are quite fragile. Do handle them with utmost care.